It is freezing outside, but in the house, fireplaces are lit and the atmosphere is warm and cozy. My children and grandchildren are on their winter break and home for the holidays. They share stories from the past few months. In the family room, the TV is on but everyone is talking. They are busy making plans for the family ski trip to Lake Tahoe. There is much laughter. And moments of reflection too. These are memories in the making that my grandchildren will cherish and share for years to come.
My childhood memories are different, but it has to be so. Times have changed and we have traveled far. It doesn't matter where we live now, all of us will have so much to remember and be thankful for. Our house in Himayatnagar, was where I spent my early years. In those days children lived with their parents till they got married or left the country to study overseas.
Take any gathering of Hyderabadis, especially my generation, the talk inevitably turns to ‘life in those days’ or ‘when we were young… ’ Our children who were fortunate enough to have visited their grandparents in Hyderabad understand the nostalgia we feel. “You change completely when your cousins and friends come over” or “we’ve never seen you laugh so much,” they remark.
My brother, sister, and me (Kashmir 1956) Sixty years later (Santa Barbara 2016)
If my parents were going to Mozamjahi Market to get fruits or mithai all of us would bundle into the car. It didn’t matter where we were going, just going together was fun.
Abid Road or Abids in those days was a fashionable shopping area, so of course, my sister, cousins, and I had to go there together. We loved browsing around at Amar’s, the popular cosmetics shop. Although we were not allowed to use makeup we bought the latest shades of nail polish, lipsticks, and powder compacts anyways, and occasionally used them.
Afternoons were spent playing in our large backyard (sehen). We stayed outside as long as we could. We invented games, played cricket, and hopscotch, and climbed trees all afternoon, careful not to venture into the area reserved for my brother’s pets. My brother had a pony, several dogs, pigeons, fish, love birds, and other pets at different times.
Me on the left with my brother and sister
Once we came indoors my mother had snacks ready for us. Curry puffs, cookies, hot toast with butter sprinkled with sugar (a substitute for jam), and chai. We even had a little chant when asking for the hot toast: “Ek toast pe, maska laga ke, shakr dal ke doe,” I don’t know if any of my cousins or siblings remember this.
Then there was a time when my sister, cousins, and I looked like multiple sets of twins. My father had his barber come to the house. I remember vividly Papa sitting under the shade of the large mango tree in the backyard while the barber deftly went about his work using my father’s personal hair-cutting tools, shaving kit, and towels. When we were around 6 or 7 years old my father would call all the children to have a haircut as well. As we grew older we avoided going anywhere near in case Papa called us, but he never did.
When we had to get vaccinations we did it together as a family! Since Papa was a doctor he was able to arrange for our vaccines to be administered at home. My extended family and the household staff were told to be ready on time. We watched as Papa and his compounder prepared the injections. The stainless steel container with the syringes was placed over the gas stove, I watched the blue flame burning and dreaded the moment the syringes would be ready.
My aunts and uncles went first to encourage the children. Then it would be our turn. Some staff would discreetly disappear but Papa would call them back and explain why it was important to get vaccinated. Some did not return till the next day!
Santa Barbara 2016
Friends or relatives stopped by unannounced, but their visits were always welcomed and so much fun! As my aunt would say ’waqt mein barkat thi’ (there was abundance in time) in those days. You could do so much during the day yet in the evening we had time to visit a relative or even go to a movie for the late show.
In 1956 my parents took my brother, sister, and me on vacation to Kashmir, stopping in Delhi to visit our dear family friends, the Mirza family. Sixty years later my brother, brother-in-law, sister, and I vacationed again. Except that we were much older, we still laughed, joked, and remembered the times we spent in Hyderabad with family and friends. And a new memory was made.
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